The average online Gen X male
A fish or dog.
Photos *Bathroom selfie containing toilet or shower, pic with fish, pic with dog, blurry pic, pic from high school, pic of abs or muscles
(Insert female eye roll here)
Initiate Random texts thru worthless apps based on photos(see above) and if lucky… ‘hobbies’
(insert second eye roll here)
Hobbies: Boating(fishing or jet skiing), biking(motorcycle or mountain), 4 wheelers, nascar, golf, bar outings drinks in hands with the guys, the beach(don’t even get me started….)
With all those hobbies my mind wanders to ‘when do men in Gen X find time to work?’
Summary: I’m tired of looking thru trading card profiles with a few random stats absent of the stick of 5 cent bubble gum.
I’m told to find him I need to put myself out there….but where is ‘there’?
My easy button?
Pointing people direct to my fb page…perfect way to cross me off your list instantly.
Perfect time to quote a Brad Paisley song ‘I’m so much cooler online’….apparently so cool, they no longer desire to be virtual friends
Had a request for height and weight
Followed that one up nicely with a ‘so how many successful dates has this question led to?” served with a complimentary ‘we even lie on our driver’s license’.
We deleted one another.
He, most likely while on his 3 hour daily bike ride.
Me, while on ‘date night’ with my dad which consisted of baked beans, ring bologna and a baked potato at his home while watching Gomer Pyle.
In my world, people contain more than a BMI layer.
So I sit at work eating carrots in a very half ass attempt to counteract last nights’ caloric consumption; and I’m smiling with content.
I truly like who I am.
It’s always a good to know who you are, but always more importantly, who you were never meant to be with.
Online dating is To Be Continued…..or perhaps…. To Be Discontinued.